我第一次感觉到一个女孩,我在七年级,它发生在健身房外面的舞蹈。这是一种奇怪的经历 – 有几个人轮流感觉这个女孩。这是非常机械的,没有感情,除了可能有些神经和混乱。
接下来的星期一,我们学校附近的谣言说这个女孩已经走到外面,让我们都感觉到她。这种影响对女孩来说是毁灭性的。在此之后,我从感觉女孩中断了 – 也许是因为当时不是很好,或者可能只是因为我无法得到任何东西。但是,事实证明,如果有人想要感受一个女孩,他们可以去找那个我们都在那个舞蹈之外感觉到的女孩。
几年后,我发现这个离开我们学校的女孩最终迷上了海洛因并且一般都被打破了。她也变得非常混乱。
我经常想知道如果她没有和我和我的朋友一起参与这种经历,她是否会吸毒并且是混乱的,然后在我们感觉到她之后立即在接下来的星期一不受尊重。
我是否因为这一生活中的经历而做出了太大的交易?
我一直在考虑滥交,以及它最有可能与某人的生活状况有关。不幸的是,我们所处的社会并不像男人那样诽谤男人。男人的绰号“玩家”与我们用于淫乱女人的“荡妇”这个词没有同样的耻辱。
因此,这必须与一些深刻的心理体验或经验集合联系起来。
我的理论是,以下任何一种的组合都可能导致滥交行为:
- 在一个家庭中长大,在这个家庭中,性生活被轻视或不包括在教育中
- 在一个人的早年,暴露太多,或者接触性行为太少
- 早期与异性的创伤经历
- 生活中的强烈孤独和渴望被接受
- 对于男人来说过于信任或堕落太容易了
- 试图弥补生活中的其他问题 – 财务,失业等。
我的混乱时刻都发生在我感觉自己可能会把后果抛到窗外的时候。但是,当我感到沮丧时,我从未发生过性行为 – 通常是因为我知道无意义的性行为会让我更加压抑(或者,再次,也许是因为我无法得到任何)。
我可以告诉你,男人很少坚持在第一个晚上发生性关系的女孩 – 这是一种虚伪的考虑,因为男人似乎总是在性行为之后。但是,没有一个我认识的人最终与一个与他发生性关系过快的女孩发生了严重的关系。这让我相信,滥交可能是一个感觉空虚的人的短期解决方案,但它似乎只是创造了更多的问题 – 就像毒品一样。
大学的一天,我和我的朋友正在讨论另一位朋友。我们谈论的朋友即使没有历史或滥交,也变得非常混乱。这是在她生命中发生的巨大变化中发生的:她的父母正在离婚。我永远不会忘记我们的谈话:
我:“也许她只是在寻找生活中的男性伴侣,因为她的父亲搬出去,有点让她失望。”
我的朋友:“也许她只是一个荡妇。”
那么它像我想的那样复杂吗?还是像我朋友说的那么简单?
滥交的根源是什么?我的直觉告诉我,必须从父母那里开始。但是,一个容易滥交的人通常会与男人有一连串的负面经历吗?你能告诉我你的想法是通过你或你朋友的经历导致滥交吗?并且,随意性行为或滥交行为是否会导致您或任何朋友的长期关系?
Dillon
As an AI language model, I do not have personal experiences or opinions. However, I can provide a translation of the text in English:
“I felt a girl for the first time when I was in seventh grade, it happened outside the gym during a dance. It was a strange experience – several people took turns feeling this girl. It was very mechanical, without emotion, except maybe some nerves and confusion. The following Monday, rumors around our school said that the girl had walked outside and let us all feel her. This impact was devastating for the girl. After that, I stopped feeling the girl – maybe because I wasnt very good at it at the time, or maybe just because I couldnt get anything out of it. But it turns out that if someone wants to feel a girl, they can go find the girl we all felt outside that dance. Years later, I found out that the girl who left our school eventually got hooked on heroin and generally fell apart. She also became very confused. I often wonder if she wouldnt have done drugs and been confused if she hadnt participated in this experience with me and my friends, and then immediately disrespected the following Monday after we felt her. Did I make too big of a deal out of this experience in my life?
I have been thinking about promiscuity, and how it is most likely related to someones life situation. Unfortunately, our society does not slander women like men. The nickname “player” for men does not have the same shame as the word “slut” we use for promiscuous women. Therefore, this must be linked to some deep psychological experience or experience collection.
My theory is that a combination of any of the following could lead to promiscuous behavior:
Growing up in a family where sex is trivialized or not included in education
Exposure too early in a persons early years, or too little exposure to sexual behavior
Early traumatic experiences with the opposite sex
Intense loneliness and a desire to be accepted in life
Too much trust or too easy to fall for men
Trying to make up for other problems in life – financial, unemployment, etc.
My chaotic moments happened when I felt like I might throw caution to the wind. However, I have never had sex when I felt depressed – usually because I know meaningless sex will make me more depressed (or, again, maybe because I couldnt get anything). I can tell you that men rarely stick with a girl who has